my hand wont hold you down no more
I created this and i named it after Love ridden. I dont know why but i really got an urge to make an online journal. my handwriting is bad, and im lazy, so my writing cant keep up with what i want to say. anyway. i hope i keep this up. my first exam is tomorrow. im so bored with it. i was studying for it, but im doing this instead. im tired. im sleepy too. i feel lonely. i've been eating less and less. i want to eat so much. but i wont. me and my boyfriend will have been together for a full year in 10 days. i guess i feel a bit scared of that. i really hate my mind. im constantly worrying about everything, especially when it comes to my boyfriend. he couldn't be any less anxiety-inducing, but im still like this. blegh. who knows. my hands are cold. the left one is especially cold. like out in the snow kind of cold. my parents are in the kitchen talking loudly. i like hearing them talk. they make for good background noise. im also listening to love ridden as i write this. i saw it come up on shuffle and i hesitated listening to it for quite a bit because i was scared it would conjure up the feelings that are prompting me to write this right now. its not so bad though.